~ My First

My ..... First ..... Kiss !!!! My first real Kiss !!! I had it that day and it was perfect =) na , it wasnt ... It was everything I didnt expect .. seen many kisses before and always wondered how it feels to be kissed by someone? .. to have two different lips come together , how does it feel when you giving that person a part of you?..

I cant find the right word or words to describe it , too many emotions in one action !!

you feel the rush within you , you feel the softness of the lips of that someone , you feel warm , hot , Turned on loooooool , and you feel like your gonna explode within any sec cause you got all of those emotions running through you yet you dont know where or when you let them go

Never thought that I would know what to do when you kiss someone but I guess it comes naturally @.@ looooool this is tooooo personal for me to put it here but I just wanna say go and kiss someone you'll be surprised @.@ LOL

Needy

How I hate it when I'm Needy ? how I hate need you ?! and how I hate the fact that I cant do anything about it ? ... I'm so weak and I just dont know what to do ?!! too emotional to even think ?! I just want the sweet , tender you .. I know I have been such an Idiot but what Im going through is really outta my control and I hope you understand that ... I'm waiting for Your call ... I Miss you ... and I hate that Im feeling like what I feel right now , Cause I'm scared .... so Scared to open up ....!!!!!!!!

.... Could Be You ....

could it be be ?!! Am I really opening my heart for you ?! Am I failing ?! .. those questions I Failed to answer .. I was scared I was determined .. what is happening to me ?! are you the fate that I have been running from ?! or your the light at the end of my tunnel ?!! .. you have giving me your heart and soul and made me feel a shamed each time that I talk to you , each time that I meet you , its strange how I feel .. you wanna give me everything yet I got nothing to give.. I didn't like who you are when I first met you .. I didnt expect that I would find home in your arms .. I was struggling that day .. didnt want it to happen I felt sick just thinking about the Idea of me and you alone ... now togetherness is all I'm after , you made me feel again , you made me feel a life ,,, you love my falls , understands me even when i say nothing at all , you have surprised me !!! I didn't know that someone like you would ever exist , I really had a wrong definition of LOVE and you just make me see what right in each day !! Im so surprised that im writing this but I dounno why im doing this but I feel so so so strange feeling I cant even decide which word would fit perfectly in here its just whatever in there that im keeping it inside .. we Talked for hours and today you were feeling down and I cared actually I was upset that your so blue , I wanted to take all your sadness away and wash all your troubles away ... Can I ?!! wanna hold you so close n feel you breath , wanted to lay ur head against my heart and hold you tight ...keep you safe , wanna make you feel like u made me feel that day ..I know sometimes I can be clueless and dont know what should I do to make you feel better but I do now and I cant wait to show you how I care about you ,..Im listening to your song ...

I'm haunted by this photograph

Don't know why

Everytime I look, I get shivers down my spine

You're such a beautiful face

I know those eyes

They take me back in time

I wish that i could tell you

What you don't know

I dream about that day

But it's impossible

In another world,

I'll be yours tonight

But i can't break free from this life

I know I promised you not to think about it but i cant help it , I'm really sorry that your going through this and I'm sorry that I'm helpless but I promise I'll make it up for you .. My sweet Baby ...

......

... Flying Without Wings ...

Falling....

I've been spending all my time

Just thinking about ya

I don't know where to

I think I'm fallin' for you

I've been waiting all my life

And now I found ya

I don't know where to

I think I'm fallin' for you

I'm fallin' for you

http://www.mediafire.com/?mqjzmn2j5qy

http://www.zshare.net/audio/613638833f44a1be/

2nd of july

wooooooooooohoooo Finally Im GRADUATED , ( tears ) God cant believe it , no more university!!! aaaaa had a rough time last week , was a fried of failing n marking my last days with a big failure but thanx god its turn out to be just great , got lotsa present + i was the Barbie of the party as everyone was calling me that ;) loved every single sec about that day

JLo watch from my sis , n a golden necklace a custom made with my name on it ,

pearl necklace from my friend assj ... love ya

from my dear friend bosh ( L )

this is the souvenir we made for the party we added chocolate n a ribbon of course , had one I'll take a pic once i get out of my laziness looool , Got a gift from my lovely bro also but couldnt find the pix =/ anyway , my day started at 9 i woke up took a bath got my stuff ready n burning some of the songs we like so i can give it to the dj to play later on , went to assj's house at 1 pm a bit early loool stayed there for 15 mins n we wen out to tamimi to get some last min shopping for the party ;) then went to the salon where we did our make up finished at 5 pm then went to the other salon for the hair which looked gorgeous !! loool got to the hall at 7 pm then we arranged everything there , i was there wearing a pajama cause my dress somehow got missing , at 9 finally got it and yeah it was late got dressed up n then went to welcome the guests with a wide open smile looool , the look on my parents eyes n my sisters that day means the worl to me even my Dr's where empraising me with their words made me soooooo happy that i finally can say yes I did it :) im proud and happy to make them proud , had a chance to say my speech and also to thank those who helped me along the way ;) It was great , and inshallah it will be from now on ......... ( two thumbs up for moi looool )

Everybody L!es ......

Ambition ...

... ummmm got me thinking why did I publish this blog when I dont have the time to post or actually write something good ;) .. well I just want it to mark every step of the way cause I feel that I was born again and wanted to make sure that i have a place that I would keep my memories in the good ones of course ;) ... I usually write in my diary but that like from time to time caus eim not the diary kinda girl who writes every detail of her life in it , Nop Im not !!! cause I usually end up burning the stuff I used to have this note book , I had it when I was at High school .. which I burned 3 years a go it didnt do me good but reminding me of things I should forget ... so thats what I do I dont throw things away but burn them cause I kept them for a period of time , I'm sure they meant something to me but not anymore ... Let them n their memories hide n fly with each flame .. it may sound mean but its just my way ;). .... anyway .... as for the marking thing God !!! tooo much things wallah , even though its my last semester n I have some personal stuff going on n I have been so stressed out + broke looool + having such mood swings but somehow its the best ... with every day passes there is something ., everything is moving too fast yet so sweet ...7amdellah .. the uni has been planing so many graduation parties for us and we had 2 which i didnt attend looool I didnt like to go + Im having my own party yaaaaaaaaay the party that I would never wanna miss ;) Dr. samia got me a prize as a thank you for all of my efforts on the uni bored , felt so happy when I got her call inviting me to the gathering n telling me that Im her " STAR" Dr. samia didnt know me for the past 3 years at uni even though , I took 3 classes with her but she did she now have my number + full name + say hi + hugs in the hall its awesome !!!! I'm awesome !!!! looool not really but I always wanted her to notice me and 7amdellah the goal is achieved :) here is the call I got from her looool

so now comes the prize ;) ... here is what she gave me + a certificate

Thank you Dr.samia ;) ....... next would be the invetation cards for my graduation party !!! I got them 2 days agao and they loook fantastic yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaata !!!!

here is one ... and pardon the bad quality its captured by my Iphone

simple but fits the decoration ;) awwwwwww n today I got a call at 6:00 am from Tut telling me that she gave birth to a sweet lil girl , so happy for her a momy for the first time ... I'll be visiting her later this week inshallah , cant wait to see the baby .. love baby borns ;)

.......till then

Betsy !!

;)

been awhile since i actually posted something or even opened my laptop , i had a surgery last week and I wasnt able to , its a " laizk "that only took about 30 min suffered from pain for 3 days and experiencing how would I be If I were blind !! but 7amdellah I'm all better now and I actually had to say goodbye to my glasses it feels GREAT loooool but not the no make up part specially when ur an addict to eye liner loooooool

in few weeks im gonna graduate still not done yet with the party planing , bouought a dress though yaaaaaaaaay ;) its a betsyville dress , it was love from the first sight loool

still wanna buy shoes n pearls to go with that lil dress ;).... wish me luck , and I would welcome any further suggestion about it loooool

Unwritten !!

I'm starting to see the unwritten ;) , There's a weird calmness with in , I've never thought I would feel this way , Happy I guess ............ THANK YOU GOD

Halo ,

Between living these days and planing what am I suppose to do in 3 months from now , between losing and winning , between facing and hiding , I've been in some sorta Halo lately

everything is kinda going the way I wanted to be or to be honest its actually not coz u dont get what u plan for u do always get plan A or B not even D but You get Fate instead !!

and thats what im facing it , im trying to be friends with my fate , so if my fate wants me to get a D this semester I'll say " yeah " uf my lovely fate wants me to be married in 3 months well

sure " yeah " again , coz im trying to be my fate's friends and thats what friend should do !!

coz sometimes its Fate who would accompany you along the way , so , I should respect it and give it a chance to be heard eventually , I cant just shut my ears forever , right ? gotta listen to what's my fate has been trying to tell me ,

so my lovely fate , im finally listening and trying my best to have such a great boned with you

please dont let me down ;)

x0x

Strange and Beautiful ..

Dressing up really feels Gud , I had fun yesterday went SHOPPING yaaaaaay + I got a really great news + everything is going so gud with my graduation party and nabel is just a maestro lol

didn't really buy too much , here's what i bought

+

=

Love ruffles ^^

finally , my skinny jeans

and that was it :)

My Twilight !!

well , today was and still a very relaxing day for me !! it simply , started with aheadache and 6 hours of waiting !! and im still by the way , yup waiting for Miss Mona to update my schedule , hopefully she will by the end of today and will save me from going tomorrow to uni

of course spending 6 hours of just waiting is such a lame and boring idea , " I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING " that was the first think that came outta my mouth ... and I did

ok first , I sent an email to Dr.Marcia wishing her to get well soon she had an accident and I was really worried that she actually hunted me in my dream . then , I simply went from being that lazy , bored girl to the geek version of me and that's when I looked for the name of the books for those semester and registered on my teachers online studying data base !!! I was the First , what a geeek !!! I KNOW doing this and that made me think a lil of my twilight and of the time when will I really be stepping into that !! ummmm , could it be my graduation coz I really have been waiting for that moment since ever , but I dunno graduate ppl dont think so

at least that's what they've been telling me or maybe its when that day comes yea the day when I have my own shop where i get to sell some of my own works ummm or maybe it will be when I find my someone !!! whom will love me till the end ,no no no wait maybe , maybe its when i finally get the chance of having my dream job that doesn't pay well , to tell the truth I really have a lot of things that i always wanted to do or have but I really dont know how or when

sometimes I got to do some of them but when I did it didnt feel like Im reaching My twilight or even close to it ;( sadly, you come to realize the truth at the final stop before opening the door

and instead of welcoming your twilight with an open arms it simply fades away

Keep it Clean ...

O.k  in my last post i did make lil plans for ma break and I was so determine on making them LoL to tell the truth I wasn't truly trying my best for some but i will *inshallah*

anyway , as i had a whole day for myself  on Tuesday and i was left alone at home doing nothing i have decided  to clean out my closet as I promised before , that how my closet looked like before , absolutely yaaaaaaaaaaki 

what i did  is I got all of my clothes outta my closet and started to categorize each LOL

and here comes the MESS !!! yup yup such  mess i was trapped in my own clothes !!

I got boxes that I have filled with the unwanted clothes  , clothes that didnt fit , and of course the ones that you always buy and never wear ;)

as I was looking through the clothes I found  this tee 

I got it as a gift from Aj she bought it from spain ^_^ cute !!

so , after spending 7 hours @.@ I finally finished cleaning 

and here's how it looks like now ..

and as my mother would always say to me * KEEP IT CLEAN * I write my final words , LOL

G ....Party

Well , what do I have  , ummmm lets see , yea 

I just finished my Finals and my break has just started hurrrrrrrrrrrrrray !!! its seems that I'll be having such a great break for two weeks , got so many plans 

today im gonna go to Aj  , we are having a GRADUATION party !!!  finally , im a grad student LoL waited many years to say that T.T  but im really so excited i got to do the decoration thing  went with my pals to see the place  and it was great  and today  inshallah we will decide what we are gonna do with the decoration and exchange our ideas with Nabeel 

so im sure im gonna have fun looool , im also planing on redecorating My own room , yup im so into decorating love mixing and arranging things , umm my room is gonna take awhile though i was extremely busy so i just bough few things and still gotta order some stuff online  , but first gotta get all of the clothes that i dont need and send it to charity , gotta have more space for the new stuff  hopefully i would do that on tuesday , for the weekend i got a call today form a friend who wanted to hang out but she said that she will get back to me , so, im waiting ;) gotta look for a graduation dress though , coz I wanna  get ready earlier and set everything for my finals  i gotta have 3 choices A,B and C  loool  incase i got fat lool or lost weight somehow , even though I have been gaining lately Lol ,, 

                                                        ok  i wasn't planing on writing that much lol

emoshi

 hello , yaaaay  finally got a blog after 12 months of waiting LoL